When and where should i arrive?
We'll see you at the Artists for Humanity Epicenter, located at 100 W 2nd Street in Boston. The doors open at 4pm, please arrive promptly for pre-ceremony soft drinks. We're saving the hard stuff for after the ceremony.
Will you be standing in front of us while we sit in chairs looking at you?
Yes, only in Soviet Russia do bride and groom sit in chairs looking at you.
Will you be wearing fancy outfits?
Yes, we are excited for you to see Renee shine in a fancy dress!
Will Renee walk down an aisle?
Yes, everybody will watch Renee walk down the aisle, awestruck by her majesty. Tears of joy optional, but encouraged.
Should I wear a fancy outfit?
Declaring a dress code is a little too rigid for us, but to avoid unnecessary stress or processing, the headline is “vibrant semi-formal…and just the right amount of too much.” What that means in practice: we would love to give you a reason to pull out all the stops and get as dressed up as you want, it’s way more important to us that you’re showing up comfortable, authentically you, and ready to celebrate with us. To help, we've put together this Pinterest Board for inspiration and guidance.
Additional Note: We are very strongly voting “Yes,” if any children are inspired to come with pink hair to match Renee. If that’s too much, get them that fancy dress or sequined vest you thought was too ridiculous.
Will this be a legally recognized marriage?
No, we don't need the legal protections that a legal marriage offers, and we'd rather not involve the government. We will continue using the word "partnership," not "marriage," for our relationship.
Any other language I should know to use or to specifically avoid?
Yes, thanks for asking! It’s a weddingISH, but not a marriage. We’re rather fond of dating, and hope to stretch the boyfriend/girlfriend stage of the relationship as long as it can possibly be stretched, so we won’t become each other’s “husband” or “wife” on October 12. Miro will probably scrunch his face if you refer to him as a “groom,” so you should probably just let him have his special day (he’s been more of a bride in this process anyway).
Will this be a religious ceremony?
No, our relationship and our ceremony are secular affairs, but you may see nods to the faith traditions that shaped us. We hope to receive your blessings in whatever way you express them.
How did you come up with all this?
We're thrilled you asked. We used our Relationship Check in process. This whole idea emerged from the regular discussions we have to help us set clear intentions and live our lives in alignment with them. We hope you’ll steal the best parts for yourselves (and let us know what resonated)!
Here are the ground rules for our process:
- Check-ins are the time to leave nothing important unsaid. These are the times to be clear with each other and address everything. Show up ready to both talk and listen.
- When we make commitments for the upcoming period, the only commitment you are really making is to show up to the next check in and reflect on what happened. If you said “we will text every night” it’s not actually a commitment to do that. It’s a commitment to show up next month and talk about what we learned
Key documents:
Did we miss something? Got more questions? Ask us! As you know, we love talking about it!